The main local news in Germany for the past several months has been about the drought.  Nearly biblical in nature.   Cruise sites have been inundated with comments.  Complaints abound about cruise lines underplaying the problem and repeatedly forecasting rain.  With all that on my mind, I wrote the following satirical version of Max Ehrmann’s Desiderata.  I post it here for posterity.  BTW, Desiderata was NOT written in 1692, but in the early 20th century.

Desertonriver – Words to Cruise By

Go placidly amid the extreme low water,
and remember what peace there may be on buses.
As far as possible without confusion
be on good terms with all tour guides.
Speak your frustrations quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the loud ones behind you;
they too have their sad story.

Keep interested in the journey, however unplanned and mysterious;
it is what it is.
Exercise caution in getting off the bus;
for the cobblestones are full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to the beauty of industrial piers;
many dockworkers strive for cleanliness;
though everywhere life is full of raw sewage.

Be comforted in your cruising decision.
Especially, do not blame the cruise line.
Neither be cynical about false promises of rain;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment
it is as perennial as any business decision.

Take kindly the emptying of your wallet,
gracefully surrendering the trip’s expenses.
Nurture strength of spirit to shield you from last minute changes.
But do not distress yourself with forgotten toiletries.
Many losses are born of fatigue and loneliness.
Beyond a wholesome casting of blame,
be forgiving of your spouse.

You are a slave to the elements,
no less than the captain and crew;
you have a right to be screwed with.
And whether or not it is accepted by you,
no doubt the climate is changing as it should.

Therefore, be at peace with Mother Nature,
No matter how angry you are with her,
and whatever your hopes and expectations,
in the noisy confusion of swapping ships, keep peace with yourself.

With all its swaps, buses, and broken plans,
it is still a beautiful cruise.
Use your drinks package.
Strive to be (occasionally) sober.